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Jay Allen

When You Catch Your Kids Looking At Something They Shouldn’t

By February 12, 2019 No Comments

Sadly, the world of pornography is continuing to grow and as a result, the addiction to lust and pornography has never been more rampant. Did you know that the Porn Industry makes more than every sports franchise in the entire world combined? (MLB, MLS, NBA, NFL, etc.)

Studies have even been conducted by Neuroscience studies show that addiction to porn has been compared to an addiction to drugs like Cocaine and Heroin. It’s absolutely real and if we’re not careful, it can damage your kids forever. The average age of Pornography exposure is 8 years old so if you think your kid is too young to be exposed to this, you couldn’t be more wrong.

That’s a position that I’ve had to face for some time now. I’m 24 years old and porn has been an addiction in my life for 13 years of that. It went into my marriage and has greatly affected me emotionally and mentally. It’s causing men in their 20’s to experience ED because their thoughts and physical desires are being warped by this terrible industry. However, it’s not just ruining the lives of men. Here are some statistics that might paint a better picture:

• In 2015, worldwide, there were more than 2 billion Web searches for porn.

• 20 percent of mobile-device searches are for porn.

• 90 percent of boys and 60 percent of girls are exposed to Internet porn by age 18.

• 56 percent of divorces involve one spouse (almost always the man) having an obsessive interest in online porn.

• Compared with faithful spouses, adulterers are more than twice as likely to be regular viewers of online porn.

Similar statistics come from InternetSafey101/Enough is Enough, which calls itself “the national leader in making the Internet safe for children and families.”

According to these folks:

• Porn sites attract more visitors each month than Amazon, Netflix, and Twitter combined.

• 30 percent of Internet content is porn.

• 88 percent of porn contains violence against women.

• From 2005 to 2013, searches for “teen porn” tripled to 500,000 a day.

• Compared with young adults who don’t view violent X-rated material, those who do are are six times more likely to commit sexual assault.

*Statistics are from Psychology Today*

It’s an epidemic and we as parents need to step up and make sure our kids know the truth about this because if you don’t, someone else will share it with them.

But before things go downhill, there is hope. Whether your child struggles with it currently or you’re wanting to take precautions now, here are some resources that will greatly help you and your family in this battle.

  1. Covenant Eyes: Relationships have the ability to overcome pornography’s deep deception. Covenant Eyes supports the power of Internet Accountability so you can break free from the destructive life of pornography.
  2. xBlock: Safe Browsing in Safari by Blocking Millions of Porn Sites and Filtering Explicit Content.
  3. x3 Watch: Get free and live in peace when you say goodbye to porn forever. Inviting someone else into your story is scary but will help you become the person you know you can be. X3watch gives you that connecting point with someone else.
  4. Lion: Lion is an accountability browser for iOS that keeps a log of any explicit websites you visit. It then emails a list of those websites to a partner or partners of your choice.
  5. Net Nanny: Net Nanny is a highly powerful platform for parents to control what their children are seeing and doing on the web. It doesn’t just manage the time kids spend on the web. It also helps prevent cyberbullying, monitors cell phone activity, masks profanity, and blocks access to pornography.

Now that you have some options under your belt, let’s look at the spiritual aspect of it. Filters are great and can do a world of good, but if there is one thing I know about a pornography addiction is that if someone is determined enough, they will find it or get around a filter. I mean, did you know that people have been able to find this kind of content on places like Amazon and Ebay?

So let’s look at what the Bible says:

1 John 1:9

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”

Psalm 119:37

“Turn my eyes away from worthless things;  preserve my life  according to your word.”

1 Corinthians 10:13

“No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation, he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.”

Philippians 4:8

“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.”

Proverbs 23:26

“My son, give me your heart and let your eyes delight in my ways.”

Galatians 5:16

“I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh.”

Overcoming A Porn Addiction Forever

Believe me, there are a TON of Bible verses that will highlight the importance of this topic but just for the sake of space, I chose a few of my favorites. Now these above verses are great but you also need to know who you are. You have been saved & resurrected with Christ. You a new being, which means you do things differently now.

With the help of the Holy Spirit, discipline yourself, know your triggers and do whatever it takes to avoid them. Get an accountability partner and keep reading the Bible in order to renew your mind. Psalm 119:11 says:

“I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you.”

Do all of these things in unison as they go a long way in changing you from the inside out and helping you overcome this addiction.

  1. Flee from these desires.
  2. Flee to Godly passions.
  3. Flee with Community and Accountability.

Here’s the deal, I can’t promise you that there will be a day when a person who was addicted to pornography will feel no desire whatsoever. It’s a day by day process of mentally and spiritually telling yourself that you have victory in Christ over this. Remember, assure your child that sexual desire is NOT a bad thing. Temptation will always be a part of your life and their life and if you look at scripture, Jesus even faced temptation. Temptation isn’t the problem here as facing temptation isn’t even considered a sin. It’s what we do as a result of this temptation that is key.

At the end of this all, whether you know of your child’s struggle or you’re looking to prepare for the future, I hope this helps as someone who has struggled with this a majority of my life. There is victory in Christ and if handled the right way, your child can experience freedom from this!

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